Mo’Nique believes that honesty is the key to a healthy relationship, even if that honesty means admitting you have sexual feelings for someone other than your spouse.
“Honesty. That’s it. When I hear men say ‘I don’t tell my wife everything, you crazy?’ and I hear women say ‘I ain’t telling my husband that, you crazy?’ So you mean you trust somebody else other than the person you lay with every night, you slept with, you cried with, you make love to?” she said in an interview with True Exclusives. “So I think those long lasting things is simply honesty and communication. It’s got to be your best friend. You’re laying with this person every night. If you can’t tell that person how you feel, then you’re in a bad way.”
She went on to explain how she thinks women and men should give their spouses a “pass to cheat:”
“The person that you stood up and you said ‘for better, for worse, sickness and in health, richer or poorer’ you took those vows in front of the universe. If you don’t live by them, then maybe you shouldn’t have taken them. And when you say ‘a pass to cheat’—see, when you’re with your best friend and you say to your best friend: ‘I’m having these feelings about this person, sexually, and I want to share it with you.’ When you’re best friends, you can have those open and honest conversations. Often times, people cheat because of something they’re not getting. But when you have open and honest dialogue, and you say we’re just human beings. And all these people on the face of the earth, do you think my eyes won’t ever say ‘he’s fine’ or ‘she’s attractive’?”
She then continued, “Now, if you want to go further with it, let’s be honest enough to have those conversations. What is it about that person that you find that you want to sleep with? Because they may give you something that I’m simply not willing to do. And if that’s the case, how can I be mad? Because I’m not going to do it. Should I deprive you of not having it? That’s when the relationship is real real.”
She concluded by saying that the idea of cheating being “the end” of a relationship was a Western idea and that it was part of a culture of ownership in relationships.
“We’ve been taught to have ownership, and that’s the Western way to do it. I’m not sure where you originate from, but I originate from this place called Africa and what I know about African kings—tell me one of them who just had one wife. Do you know any of them? I don’t. That’s where I originate from. So when we came here, we adopted other people’s ways, and that’s called ownership. There was a time when I was owned before. I don’t want to be owned anymore.”
fvckery
Good Day Met,Metters,Peepers nd Others….
If mo’nique don’t go sit that ass down,kmft
“pass to cheat”? No man or woman, wife or husband needs permission to cheat. If you get permission, then it is not cheating…no fun. Cheating has been with us from day one until now, that is the power of “sex”. Sometime, the mere act of cheating is sweeter that the sex that accompany the cheating.
Monique chile, that might work for ur relationship but it definitely won’t work in mine and Yes, I will share things with my best friend that I wouldn’t share with my spouse not everyone’s . capable of handling the truth
Mi guess ah fi har way of dealing wid ah man whey cheat. Caw I dow know if summin can guh suh. Ur spouse cheats but ur in a “healthy relationship”..nuh one oxymoron dat?
Di tings dat people are will fi accept fi di sake of having smaddy is unreal….smh
She might not be brainwashed by the western world but she hab a serious problem, mi can’t hold mi man suh mi wi mek him do wah him want, a how she conveniently figet di part of di vows to be loyal y fiel? dah deh part deh never done infront of di universe or she did skip it innah fi dem vows, my husband nuh own mi and mi nuh own him clath but if him cheat mi nahn siddung deh wid him, and if him si sitting a road wah him nahn get a yawd and mi nahn do it den him fine a lawyer and gwan him ways, some a these women nowadays mek di man dem tun dem inna fool, suh she might nuh brainwashed by di western world but di man she man looks like him of di western world and want to do all this mess, bout come from Africa and a deh suh she get har roots, kmt talk di truth u love di man and becaz u nuh want to be alone u wi mek him cheat caz u nuh confident innah wah u have wid him as a wife and wid u self, a women wid low self esteem + cocky whipped or wahevr whipped do dem crap. If is u best fren and di man u trust him should be able to move him ass out if him need sinting else, that is love and trust, talk di truth and gwan bout him biniz caz him a tell mi seh mi nuh got wah him want,no room for rent round here…dyam friggery…u soon here seh dem divorce and den she come talk bout she was rang…kmdt
so true she stay very bad and her man a gi her bun, she want come blame it pon Africa? gal go have a stadium full of seats, kmt
She might not be brainwashed by the western world but she hab a serious problem, mi can’t hold mi man suh mi wi mek him do wah him want, a how she conveniently figet di part of di vows to be loyal y fiel? dah deh part deh never done infront of di universe or she did skip it innah fi dem vows, my husband nuh own mi and mi nuh own him clath but if him cheat mi nahn siddung deh wid him, and if him si sitting a road wah him nahn get a yawd and mi nahn do it den him fine a lawyer and gwan him ways, some a these women nowadays mek di man dem tun dem inna fool, suh she might nuh brainwashed by di western world but di man she man looks like him of di western world and want to do all this mess, bout come from Africa and a deh suh she get har roots, kmt talk di truth u love di man and becaz u nuh want to be alone u wi mek him cheat caz u nuh confident innah wah u have wid him as a wife and wid u self, a women wid low self esteem + cocky whipped or wahevr whipped do dem crap. If is u best fren and di man u trust him should be able to move him ass out if him need sinting else, that is love and trust, talk di truth and gwan bout him biniz caz him a tell mi seh mi nuh got wah him want,no room for rent round here…dyam friggery…u soon here seh dem divorce and den she come talk bout she was rang…kmdt. Wah bun mi more dan anything is that a lot of young girls look up to these women for guidance…if she stating these things wah going to happen to all dem likkle young gal wah look up to har… wid all the evil wah a gallan wid coloured people this crap is not needed…
Having feeling does not mean u have to act on them, that is wah love is all about, suh if him seh him feel fi kill somebody wah u going to seh, go ahead boy I’ll be here wid the water and soap and alibi fi u caz u tell me what u wanted to do and mi trust u as a result, well if dis aint some kinda crazy f-ed up reasoning I do not know, dah fat must be squeezing har brain or somebody tek ovah har body fi this interview…why would someone give another person so much power over them is beyond me..good luck to har and this nonsensical reasoning
People like she mek mi wish self esteem, self worth and dem sumpn deh did sell a shop. And the husband look fruitier than an orchard, kmt…
WTF…cheating is when u a fuk somebody n ur woman r man don’t know the 2 A dem all talk one know n the other have no clue
ITS called swinging its the new trend now been around for years as a privite society but more people getting more open with it now. Thats what she an her husband do she just a put it in a nice way
it’s called being sexually positive and a lot of couples are doing it now. my thing is, what makes your man exclusive to u and u to him if u can both just grind anything a road? Why u took vows with this person if him a do the same things wid u weh him a do wid everybody else? My man is mine and I am his, if him a do anything a must fi mi nuh know or find out, cause I could never live a life like that.
I think yall are perfectly right if yall refering to what unno will n will no put up with. Don’t lose sight of the key question that matters in ALL relationships!!Are u happy?? Look how much women put up with abuse n cheating,hell look at that ring di alarm song Beyonce do fi rihanna!! She not leaving no matter the bun Jay z giving.Kobe was charged fi rape n di world see how his wife vanessa took him bk n 4give him after him give her a usd$4million ring! We can’t speak for ppl as to what constitutes their happiness,so she must follow ppl n lef him n a she one a go unhappy Inna di lonely bed like teniesha down a arizona desert??
Monique like her character in Precious is asking…Who’s gonna love me,dont I deserve to be loved too?
Mad gal dis man head gone inna real life nuh di sed one dis weh nuh like skinny gal
Thumbs up @yardielovethug… he going to di it anyway you ladies that think your man is only looking at you. .because he Said I do.that why hypertension age heart attack drs are di busy
Monique and others like har are all desperate bit-ches.
They feel like nothing/feel they are worth nothing without a man so dem put up wid anything di man fling pon dem, jus cuz dem nuh want be lonely or have a failed marriage.
di only way mi woulda knowingly mek my man fu-ck a next gal or find out seh him a fu-ck a next gal an still stay, is if dat gal is tenesha image and preload him bank account wid 3 grand every month, plus pay di rent fi di mansion every month fi mi and him live inna.
But if a marriage, no hanky panky will be tolerated, if yuh attracted to a next bi-tch, go be with that bit-ch then.
Toya carter is a next one, fool like sheep.
did you see that shit wid toya him dat boy who thinks he’s a man when de man seh toya give 8 hall pass for the year i was like weh him jus seh :nerd
Simpli, as i said before, these bit-ches weh allow dem man fi cheat have low self esteem and have sad lives.
Toya try fi pass harself off, as smart, classy and more than just di famous grimlin babymadda. But all that is a front, because yuh cyaah tell me seh, she couldn’t si seh dat man is a mampala.
Mi affi wonda sometime, how these women who try fi pass demself off as smart and together, how dem fall fi some idiot man? dat sh-it always baffle mi. Because, why di man cum a road cum seh dat? him a try shame har, because he is a pu-ssy
Mo’Nique yuh fava fart. Go right ahead and tek yuh bun dem cause dat is your personal business. No need fi dis dyam foolish interview cause John Public done know seh yuh self esteem shot. Fi years yuh hate pon skinny gurls, when deep dung yuh overweight self ah wait pon clearance fi gastric bypass. Gwaan weh you ah guh wid yuh hot air self…..:travel
honestly too much disease going around to be allowing hall passes and cheating come with too much emotional baggage to just look at it so simple. You should find out what type of things your partner into before hand so u don’t get no outlandish request down the road and have to tell them to go look it.
I so agree with Monique. Im in a relationship for over 5yrs and me and my boyfriend is good friend and we talk open. I allow him to have sex with other females especially when he goes to Jamaica and I’m unable to go. I would Skype and he would show me a girl that he likes and would ask me if he could have sex with her and if I see her talk to her and she not looking for a relationship from him I watch him put his condom on and by skype watch him f..k her.i even tell her how to su.k his d..k and I watch them f..k .and I’m not bi-sexually. I don’t like girls but I just do it for him. I even have him sex a few of my friends that wanted to f..k him because I always talk how great of a love maker he is and how him d..k big and how him can f..k really good.and i had a friend that beg me a f..k off him.and it does not bother me .I rather him tell me his needs and desires than hide and have other relationships. Because man will pretend like it’s only u them have and them have other relationships fi years even have outside children and u home thinking all is well. Until one day him tell you him fall out of love with you and move out after 10 years or 15 yrs or 20 yrs of you guys been together with 2 or more children even move out while u pregnant or have young baby and leave you to stress and depress. I’m with Monique I own him but I allow him to f..k other girls i even allow a few of the girls to s..k my p….y .I have never suck theirs but he wanted to watch and I did it .i don’t like it but maybe 1 to 3 times per year I will give him the gift of been a bad boy and I be a bad girl.I love him and he loves me and that’s all that matters.
:nerd :hoax2 :hoax2 . No words!!
:nerd :hoax2 :hoax2 . No words, except that u confused and need likkle clarity and self empowerment. That is not love chile, whenever someone who professes to love you, knows that you do not like something, and or is uncomfortable with doing something yet still “forces” you to do it anyways, that is not love, because love is not selfish. Converse and conversate all unu want, but that man using u like a doorknob that is on a broken down door, call it what you may but that is not love,that is playing dolly house and train station… all I see is a man using you..dis a race one sided chile, and u don’t in any lane. U nuh bi but u mek next gal nyam u, not fi your pleasure but fi di man and u nahn enjoy it, u nuh si seh sinting rang wid dah? Plus u all a watch di man a grind pan skye wid other women that you talk to and decide dem don’t want him? Pardon mi but if that is not some hella crazy mess den I don’t know. May the spirits, Bhuddah, Jah be with you…caz dah man soon gone.or u going to get fed up. Man dus a tek and and a tek and u juss a gi and a gi..wid u yei wide shut..
Until one day him tell you him fall out of love with you and move out after 10 years or 15 yrs or 20 yrs of you guys been together with 2 or more children even move out while u pregnant or have young baby and leave you to stress and depress. I’m with Monique I own him but I allow him to f..k other girls i even allow a few of the girls to s..k my p…
Ah wandah wah going to happen when dis man tell u dese samething aftah u go climb kilamanjaro “innah winter & summa it look like” wid all dese thing fi him? I would rather know seh mi nuh put up wid dem tings and him leff than di reverse. Dat is weh u rang, u don’t own dis man a him own u, him is on errybody plantation suh him don’t hab a mastah,. Why is it dat it is the women who are so quick and open to “holding” the men by any means when it should be the reverse? unu need fi realize unu worth and not lower it to wah unu man set it, wat a piece ah kakahfart inna Jahjah wull!..
U r absolutely right Titan to be honest he still could leave at any time for whatever reason and then she’d be gutted to know that he played her the whole time as he was having his cake and eating it too literally and figuratively! Self worth and self esteem are definately lacking here!
Thats a no no. It’s not good to go take up anybody out there. You dont know what crosses you’ll bring. What if that other person want you? What if they crazy? What about diseases? What if the next man and woman start stalking and etc. You got to be careful. REDFLAG