Hundreds of Vanessa Collier’s friends and family gathered Saturday at New Hope Ministries, sitting before an open casket that held the woman they loved, when suddenly the minister overseeing her funeral stopped the service.
The memorial could not continue, Pastor Ray Chavez said, as long as pictures of Collier with the love of her life, the spouse she shared two children with, were to be displayed.
Chavez said there could be no images of Collier with her wife, Christina. There could be no indication that Collier was gay.
Outraged, those who loved Collier, 33, picked up programs, flowers and eventually the dead woman’s casket itself, moving the service to a mortuary that — thankfully, they say — happened to be across the street.
“It was humiliating,” said Victoria Quintana, Collier’s longtime friend. “It was devastating.”
Collier’s friends, many of them lesbians, already were accustomed to dealing with the social and political challenges of their sexual orientation. Then they were faced with the death of a friend who, Thornton police say, may have committed suicide. Then last weekend, as they mourned, they were confronted with a church that wouldn’t let them celebrate Collier’s life because of what the minister called an “alternative lifestyle.”
A representative for New Hope Ministries declined to comment before hanging up on a Denver Post reporter on Tuesday. A biography on the church website says Chavez founded the ministry in 1981 with his wife, Lola. It says the church “is a place where those bound by drugs, alcohol, gangs and violence can find an ‘Ounce of Hope.’ ”
That hope was denied to Collier because she loved a woman, friends said.
“A church turning away a funeral. Who has ever heard of anything like that happening?” said Jeanette Arguello, a friend.
About four dozen supporters gathered outside of the church Tuesday afternoon in protest, chanting “Give us an apology!” and “Shame on Pastor Ray!” Security guards were stationed in front of the building to ensure none of the marchers made their way onto the property.
“You will not find Jesus at New Hope but you will find hypocrisy,” said a sign carried at the demonstration. “Indignity in death,” read another.
An hour-long viewing of Collier’s body had just finished and the memorial service was 15 minutes underway when Chavez stopped it, those in attendance said.
Friends say they gave the church a remembrance video of Collier a week before that contained images of her kissing and embracing her wife. The pastor had every chance to stop the funeral long before it began, they said.
Collier, the mother of two girls, 7 and 11, lived in Thornton and died Dec. 30. New Hope Ministries was chosen for the memorial service because of its location — close to where Collier and her friends grew up, friends said.
David Campanella, area manager for Newcomer Funeral Home, where the service was moved, said they handled all of the funeral services for Collier’s family when at the last minute the ceremony for Collier was moved from the church to the funeral home.
“Certain events were not going to be allowed to take place according to the church,” Campanella said. “In talking with family we decided it would be best to have the services here.”
Friends say the funeral home space was cramped and that Collier’s family had little space to sit. The service moved from a spacious chapel and became standing-room-only in a matter of minutes.
Collier’s friends say they still haven’t been reimbursed by New Hope Ministry for the cost of the funeral.
“We want to pray that the Lord helps (Chavez),” Jose Silva told protesters Tuesday, pointing at the church.
“We are in mourning.”
metty good morning, how u do? off topic but did u see this? http://m.jamaicaobserver.com/mobile/news/Another-rich-J-can-under-US-probe_7726628
a fi him church him do weh suit him
Good mawning Real. Yu REAL fe real!
For one , people a church ina church and dem was never member nor did they attend church. Mi nuh know wha fi seh bout the pastor walking out at the last minute but dem a talk bout refund and they did not leave the church when di man step out..dem carry on same way but the church should not have taken the money for a funeral of a person the church didn’t know. Thats wrong
A true met…wah day m i do a research pon di federal correctional system and dem seh u haffi go by weh how u born …..so if u a transgender and u born male u r male …so mi nuh know a whapen to ppl ..
I agree Met, de Pastor man should NOT have taken de money of de deceased person’s family if him know say dat him disagree with the type of lifestyle that the woman lived BEFORE she died (Same thing applies to murderers, criminals, etc). If he knew that he felt uncomfortable carrying out the funeral proceedings because of her sexuality, all he had to say was no to begin with instead of stopping the service. Yes, it’s his church, and his right as a Minister to pick, choose, and refuse the type of service to be held in his church, and I agree wid that part, but he had one week prior to the funeral to decide if he really wanted to do it, and he did it, and cause de people dem more grief, and a dey so him wrong.
I didn’t know church charge for funerals? Wow I learned something new today, I always thought once u were a member of the church, or someone close to u is a member they allow it. Didn’t know money was involved.
Yes they do charge for funerals and weddings
Silly pastor.
But whole heap a churches turn weh funerals, but they reject them from the get go, so they ppl don’t have false hope. There are many churches that cater to gays and are gay friendly, gay ppl need to seek out those churches when they need religious services.
Yes 1 church not far from part weh me live have 1 big rainbow flag up with big sign that say all welcome next time me drive pass it gone take a pic
Of course all are should be welcome to the church but they should conform to the rules of that religion nuh suh?I hope that church with that flag knows that