‘Cougar’ Country – Older Women Main Culprits As More Than 50 Per Cent Of Jamaica’s Teenage Boys
Older women main culprits as more than 50 per cent of Jamaica’s teenage boys engage in transactional sex
More than 50 per cent of Jamaica’s boys between the ages of 15 and 19 years old are engaged in transactional sex, and one expert is convinced that this is because a number of unattached youths are turning to ‘cougars’ to provide money, favours, or gifts in exchange for sex.
Cougars are popularly defined as women in their 40s (or older) who date significantly younger men, generally at a 10-year age gap or more, and adolescent programme manager at the Ministry of Health, Marion Scott-Thomas, said this trend is being seen in Jamaica and is very worrying.
According to the 2012 HIV/AIDS Knowledge, Attitudes, Behaviour and Practises survey, 24 per cent of girls and 54 per cent of boys between the ages of 15 and 19 years old are engaged in transactional sex.
“Generally, it is among women, but we are seeing now where it is catching on with boys, unfortunately,” Scott-Thomas told The Sunday Gleaner.
“We have higher rates of school dropouts among boys, more so than females, so that sort of accounts for how they are getting money, who is supporting them, how they are able to live. Some of them are engaged in transactional sex,” added Scott-Thomas.
MEANS OF SURVIVAL
She argued that some of the boys do it to survive, while others engage in these relationships for material gains.
“I can’t say what the factual reasons are, but we have some anecdotes, so you will hear about cougars and you think cougars are only overseas, but some young Jamaican men resort to older female partners who take care of them for lack of a better term, and in taking care of them, they provide sexual favours,” she said.
Transactional sex among adolescents in Jamaica was one of the issues highlighted last week by UNICEF in its situational analysis for safety and justice for Jamaican children.
The report provides an overview of some of the major issues affecting Jamaican children in the areas of protection, health, education, social protection and the environment.
Scott-Thomas said that the issue of transactional sex is of major concern to the Ministry of Health, since the survey has shown that only 38 per cent of those engaged in transactional sex used a condom every time.
She noted that boys sometimes have a false sense of security when in a relationship with older women.
“An older woman may seem more established, more careful, more responsible, and they may not see any risk of a STI or HIV, or even pregnancies from an older woman.”
Scott-Thomas has also found that multiple partnerships is especially high among the young boys, with some using the money they get from the sugar mommies to maintain relationships with girls in their age group.
She said that the findings relating to the high number of adolescent boys engaged in transactional sex are not alarming, given Jamaica’s current reality as it relates to unattached youths.
“Unfortunately, we have a lot of unattached youths, young men who are not involved in any kind of gainful employment or skills training or anything, (just) sitting around. So how do they survive? Young people like to party, how do they get to go to the parties? If you have a nice sugar mama (and) you want a car, you get a car to drive,” she noted.
Gifts And Favours
“Transactional sex for us is not just money, it is gifts and favours, so if you can drive her car and go and ‘floss’ with your friends or pick up your next girlfriend or you can get the latest things, or whatever else from her, then that we will consider to be transactional sex,” said Scott-Thomas.
She said that parents have a role to play in curtailing this trend. But mothers generally do not seem to have a problem with their adolescent boys having sex, and so the conversation about sex is different for boys when compared to girls.
“You don’t want your girl to get pregnant, you want her to remain a virgin until she is married, while the boys are allowed to be free and prove their manhood by having sex early. Culturally, that is how we socialise our boys. I think we need to look into how that is harmful to them and the risk that it causes, how it affects them planning for their lives and setting goals.
“It is not just a health issue, it is a social issue and a developmental issue,” added Scott-Thomas.
This is Jamaica’s sad reality. It has always been this way especially with young girls and older men …..and it was tolerated because the older man would support this young woman’s entire family….but now …..with the help of Social Media (which encourages flossing and bragging) and this modern way of life (which encourages material things as a show of “good living”) ….. young men are now being more up-front and brazen about “transactional sex” with older women. Many moons ago…..young men would sleep with older women because it made them feel like a real man. They would whisper it to their brethrens who would make sure to keep it quiet. Back then…..if it was found out…..the woman would be made out to be “a dutty wukliss woman who a grind off the likkle boy dem”. I had a similar conversation with a friend a few weeks ago. He was telling me about a friend of his, maybe about 20 years or so ago (he was maybe about 14) who started sleeping with a much much older woman. He said he realized what was going on when he saw the little boy sneaking in-and-out of older woman’s yard. He said he confronted him and after several attemps, the boy admitted that he was sleeping with the woman but he begged him not to say anything to anyone. The benefits of sex with her, was that he could go to her house and chill whenever he was having problems with his mom. He got money from her and respect from her and her friends. But today …..it seems like the norm. No hiding. Remember….. many Jamaican mothers have always been known to send their young daughters off into the world with the slogan “MEK SURE YUH NUH FUKC FI NUTTEN….NUH TEK UP NO MAN DAT CANNOT MIND YUH”. Women do it as a means of survival and providing for their children……Men do it as a means of obtaining material things for the purpose of flossing. 6 a one ….half dozen a di odda. Another growing trend …..is that of older women overseas ….supporting younger men in Jamaica. Providing them with lavish lifestyles and material possessions ….even while these young men are living with girlfriends or baby mothers or even wives at home. But that should be a completely didifferent topic ….. all it’s own. LOL.
On D’angel’s wall captioned “OLD MAN JUICE scratch” so Angel a one a di cougs! :babyboy :babyboy1 me Wanda if she nuh kno she is acting out like Macka Diamond?! Dem just a find dem age and nuh si seh age a cho pan dem!
Hey Mamacita, I admire your writing style and your very good command of the English Language. You are not overbearing and its a pleasure to read when you write. If you dont mind, what is your background in? You seem like you are in one of those caring professions, Case Worker/Social Worker etc. Bless up!
Awww. Thanks a bunch. I’m neither. I actually mastered English Language and English Literature in HS….as I was always first in my class. Not sure if they even grade students (1st, 2nd, 3rd etc) anymore. That ….. combined with the fact that I’m very meticulous when I write. Many don’t know this….. but I read whatever I write multiple times….. just to make sure it’s perfectly written and I didn’t make any mistakes. I will only make a mistake if I’m in a hurry. I’ve always thought that I was anal and a bit annoying …..but now I will always remember your compliment….and feel better about being so meticulous. Thanks and have a great Sunday.
not just young men. these instagram hype males a sell sex too. ro the foreigners. in exchange for gucci. lol
Happy Sunday Met . Don’t laugh lady Met . Jah know it really feels good to get some young stiff hood . The big man dem burnt out
Ike when when cold stove out . Na lie it really feels good to get some hard hood that’s not softy .
:nerd
I actually heard the young youths are not taking care of themselves, along with the drinking and smoking, causing them to turn to Viagra.
Mamacita, mi like yu response to this article. Job well done Hon!
:kiss :2thumbup
Bizarre
So nobody going to comment on those made up numbers and statistics ?
Mi neva know mi coulda get money and tings…..cho bumbo!!
LMAO, Willie, yuh and mi inna the same boat,mi feel like a damn fool.