Hello Met and All,
I have a best friend she is my friend from as long as I can remember myself, we went to school together and did everything together. We live in country, about a year ago she started talking to a deportee who live in a big house and drive a fancy car. The deportee told her to leave her boyfriend who she has been dating since she was in 7 grade,(because him tell har ,”a man alone fi bad.) even though every month different woman come from farrin to say with him. When is not him wife, it’s baby mothers or girlfriends. When they are here she hears nothing from him, til dem gone and me haffi a dry har tears. Recently she invited mi over him place, so I went, I did not like him from a far an always lick out against him. when I met him I thought maybe I was unfair cuz he seemed nice and had a funny personality, him can run a joke yuh see.
It was getting dark and I told them I had to leave soon, he said he would shower then take me home. After the shower he came out in his towel, next ting the man drop the towel and weh mi see drop between him knees nuh normal! Mi nuh know how him nuh trip ova it!

dear-met1I was a bit uncomfortable and didn’t know if mi fi run or tek a pic fi document it to send in to the zoo cuz mi did swear mi find a new species of snakehood! MI hear mi fren she,”Yuh nuh have no shame, how you just come out and a dry off infront a him suh,” him laff and said, “mi miss a spot cum dry it fi mi.” MET, can you believe that mi fren walk ova di man an get pon har knees like she did a go lick it? Mi get mad and she,”noo, noe sar mi nuh waan see mi a go outside guh wait pon unu.” Bout ten minutes later dem come outside and him drop mi home, I was so shocked mi look pon mi fren different. MET wen mi observe har the whole day round di man is like is a new person mi a see, mi nuh know dis person, she really dickmatized! Anyway, wen she and di man reach home she call mi, and mi hear di man pon speaker a she “tell har, tell har nuh.” She kept saying,”no, no stap eeh, stap eeh nuh.” Den mi said, leave har she don’t waan tell him, den mi ask him if she do everything he say and him she,”preddy much.” Den him tell har fi stap gwan like pickeny and tell mi. MET dat is wen mi fren said the words that cut mi to mi core to dis day, she said,”We neva waan you guh home cuz wi di waan do a 3some wid yuh, cuz mi waan watch mi eat u out.” Mi shout,”gal weh yuh just said?'” Den di dutty man said, “yeah she waan eat yuh punny an mi waan watch, den join unu later.” So mi she, bitch yuh mek man tun yuh inna a f**g fool an cannibal. MET, that was two weeks ago, mi block and delete har, mi madda and granny a ask why we vex, cuz we always so tight and we never vex yet. How do I say to dem, she did waan eat me out? MET what do I do, do I speak to her, I do miss her, but dis is too much.
Not a Meal Deal


  1. So dem dutty Deportee dey stay especially when dem have a few coins. Runnnn ya babygirl, wid di amount a woman him have a fly in and out him probably have several uncurable tings

  2. Just tell you folks you and her a trod two different streets now and that’s ok. I know you probably don’t want to hear this now but going dry alot more tears for her.

  3. You have to talk to her u can’t make the man come between u and her just tell her u are not into that and move on with your friendship. That’s simply thing you don’t need to stop talking to her for that.

  4. It was hard reading what you said, gave me a headache! Learn to write properly.if you don’t agree to a 3sum that’s ok, but your over reacting to not talk to your friend, that’s immature, how old are you?

    1. It does seem immature to not talk to the friend, but ppl react differently to situations, this is when her friend needs her the most cuz, dis man is no good, even though the friend may not be receptive to her warnings. Also the sender goes in and out of patios and standard English, I don’t think it is an intelligence issue, plus nuff time she said “SHe” she probably meant “Said” the JA way but auto correct fail har, sometimes she wrote “HIM” but a “MI” she meant, just a likkle proof reading would help. I read for a living so these things not hard for me.

    2. I’m no professional and I understood every word. You only need common sense I could have read it backwards and still get it….a you slow

    3. You always come wid yu phuckry! Eat shit and lo de sender. Damn sodomites think people must accept their offers.

      Nastiness! Sadomy isn’t a part of the Jamaican mores, so sender don’t have to accept a phuck! Maturity and pussy licking aren’t relative. Just like dat bitch…just like dat!

  5. Likkle eatings never kill nobody yet,stop gwaanie gwaanie cuz u know is really ur fren man snake u a lust after!!well it seems like a package deal so u haffi eat to get ur snake treat.Dweet fi the sake of yall true real friendship! 🙂

    1. YardieT, the girl not looking anything from the dude. From she wrote that her people are wondering why she not with her friend you know the girl grow with some sort of family security; she excused herself after the towel fell.

      Nothing in the post suggested that she wanted missa donkey hood or want her childhood friend to include her in her sex life.

      Young Miss if you reading…call your friend, tell her that she insulted you and you need an apology (If she no respond to you cut her off and tell you people them what she do you).

      Next, tell her not to invite or include you in anything to do with deportee. DON’T GO ANYWHERE with this girl that has to do with someone’s house, hotel, party, movies, or transportation. You know her lifestyle now, so she’ll try to corrupt your character because “misery love company” and she will mek man/woman rape you!

  6. Sender mi sad fi yuh fren an lol at the same time yuh funny bad. Yuh fren situation reminds mi of a quote mi read once, “Young girls are like helpless children in the hands of amorous men, whatever is said to them is true and what ever manipulations on their bodies seems like love to them, sooner or later, they come back to their senses, but the scars are not dead inasmuch as her spoiler lives.” (Michael Bassey Johnson, Trials of a Damsel) Hope she comes to her senses soon.

  7. I would never look at said friend the same way again. I would not cut her off so easily because it seems like you had a sisterly bond. Talk to your friend and let her know it was very inappropriate. Some women do compromise their moral values to appease a man. She has a very low self esteem and maybe that is not her true intention. If you reason with her and she disregards how you feel or thinks that she didn’t offend you or what she said was offensive, I would cut ties. It will hurt but you will manage.

    Shit what a situation. Smh

  8. The man controls the friend and it would be nothing for them to slip her something and drug her rass then do what them what with her! (a regular them suptn deh happen)

    Di deportee nah guh ask any of him other woman dem to join in because him respect them, so him hav she who will do what him seh and him can freak her out.

    My girl, you going talk to your friend and let her know you not into what she into, but you’d like to remain friends once she nor her man don’t bring up anything like that again, and try avoid going to her and di man yard alone. Tell your family you and her on 2 different paths now, if they press you, tell them exactly what happen! Exactly what the man look like, car him drive and weh di house deh!

    Ppl nowadays will do some sick things, and u wouldn’t even think ntn of it if one day them see u a road and offer u a lift (you see where the situation a go).

    A lot of these girls weh u end up hear bout go missing, dead, or come home and don’t kno themselves,is things like this happen to happen, a lot of the times its caused by “friend/s”!

    1. YEs, Spoon, di dutty man control har yuh know hear him said, wen the girl as if the friend do wateva him ask and him replied,”preddy much.” A bet him nah ask di wife of bbymother fi do dem tings? He doesn’t respect her, he sees her a simple minded country girl who him can use in all mannners, bout him tell har left har man and she did it. Sender pray up cuz dis is a battle fi yuh fren and har soul.

  9. My friend who is bisexual asked me to do a threesome with she and her man because her man think mi sexy,she ask to eat me out all the time. I told her none of them are my type and mi naw go get wet off none a dem so them must leave me alone and laugh it off. All when mi tell her say mi naw get no sex she tell me to come mek she tek care of mi. I just laugh every time. I like our friendship so I’m not gonna let the things she say ruin it. A the devil a use her to tempt me.

  10. Don’t cut the friendship off. You friend needs help and you may be the only person aside from the man that she will listen to. She probably tied of the lifestyle herself but don’t know how to tell fi man no. I just just cannot imagine your friend eating random pum pum daily to please dis dutty man.

  11. This friend would be no help because from she said she felt bad she was so hard on him after he made her laugh couple times I knew she was just as weak as her friend. No amount of joke could make me change my perspective on a man who prior to all these laughs have shown he doesn’t mean well for my friend.

    And from the way I read that story when he walked out and dropped his towel she stood there for quite some time, she shouldn’t have even still been standing there to see her friend walk over, drop to her knees, have a dialogue then leave. Mi nuh blame the friend fi ask because something intrigued you enough to even go to the man yaad. Meet him for what? You done know already he’s a waste msn, what you wanna meet him for? Why would you need to be at his house? Just go call up your friend and make amends because clearly the 2 of you is one in the same, you’re not fooling me.

    1. Same thing I said! She wanted it and is now seeking validation from someone to say it’s okay or to blame the friend for her guilty feeling of being turned on. That’s why she’s avoiding the friend, she afraid she get turned on. From the man drop his pants, and wanted her to watch she knew what time it was. Hear her to no, “no sah”. LMAO

      Girl, go enjoy yourself, you’re a big woman. Do what you want.

  12. Your friend is like a fly got caught inna spida web. She playing with fire. If di man hood suh big when dis elephant hood man dun run through her who she going to have use for afterwards.

    I don’t care what ppl want to do in dem bedroom, but mi nuh want no close friend to bring no sex talk to mi, that to me is like muddying up clean water. Your friend is under some serious mind control. I wouldn’t surprised if all supernatural means nuh involved. Do not step foot on that man’s property or in him vehicle ever again. If even rain a pelt you and you wet like dog and him offer you a ride decline it. Pray for your friend and ask your pastor to pray for her too. You don’t have to tell anyone else what she asked you because you know your culture and that would be lifelong disgrace for her, but you can tell them you don’t support her new relationship and it caused friction between unno.

  13. some a oono slack and nawsi lol dwl and some of you old back a time anticrated the deportee freaky and have a nice piece a furniture if wife naw deal with it, the other girls will, don’t knock him some a oonu a murda woman and pickney, and by the way, SHE NO LIKE THE MAN WA SHE A DO OVER DEH GONE SIDDUNG, STAY A U F**G YARD A ONE LIFE WE HAVE TO LIVE ENJOY IT SEE SURVEY A SHOW IF U NO SEX U DEPRESSED

  14. Give me you fren name and number…..she can do the eating while mi sample dat long donkey hood……wonder If a mi deportee fren…..sender a new york him get deported from? Just curious ooohhhhh dat donkey hood have lasting memories all whipped lashed me a get

  15. I see a lot of people on here are not experienced !

    This is what you do, let your friend know whether face to face over brunch or dinner whatever you want, could be a phone call could be an email or text message let her know what she did was unacceptable. Tell her your true feelings! Now after you’ve let her know what’s up don’t cut off your friend completely
    But move different ! Cut down all conversation and hanging out with her. You want to teach her a lesson let her see what it feels like to lose you because the man is controlling her and manipulating her & just by the look of things it seems he would probably go behind her back and look you too! I can’t say you wouldn’t fall for it cuz I’ve seen it one too many times ! You probably would .. As someone said the way you spoke about his parts seems you are slightly interested in the man but not the friend eating you! If you truly felt some typa way give her a break she need a good time out !

    I’ve done threesomes before but I’ve never asked my best friend or any friend that’s really close to me because of the level of respect I have for them! Besides it will be an awkward friendship after that ! And she not gonna ask one time it will be a regular thing and you all will fall out for good eventually!!! To avoid this from happening never you ask your best friend to come in your bed that’s like asking your blood sister ! Disgusting and disrespectful !!! Your friend is a fool to the idiot deportee bwoy! When me a do 3 some I do it with women who I find attractive not women my man find attractive I seek them out get to know their character and how they are and then draw them in ! We have no history together as it should be and she can go on her way then ON TO THE NEXT !!!!! Cuz u can’t bring the same chick in a threesome all the time that’s boring you gotta keep things spicy !

    Best of luck!

    Met me a change me name hahhaa

  16. My long time friend from I was 14, and she was 16 pull that crap once – I guess she couldn’t hold it anymore and just asked. But looking back over the years she would say little things, about my body that made me uncomfortable but I would just laugh it off and never thought she wanted to phuck me. After she asked me our friendship was never the same the trust was lost. Eventually the friendship ran its natural course because it’s hard to be friends with a woman that you know wants to phuck you. Even if she wanted other females that’s her business we would have still been friends. But friendship is based on trust and I never felt comfortable trusting her again.

    Now about your family knowing. I don’t think you should tell them. As other posters said you could just explain that for now you girls are going in two different path. You may even suggest that you can’t support the relationship she has with the boyfriend and she loves him so it’s best this way. As for her and your friendship. Please know that it has changed. You girls grew up together, she knew you were straight and should have respected and honour this about you. You didn’t like her new man but you love your friend so you respected and honour their relationship. I suspect you are more of a friend to her than she is to you. If you choose to continue the friendship you now know this at least.

    All in all I must say I am proud of you. In this increasingly permissible world people don’t seem to have any problem with women and women, 3sum and a whole heap more. You resisted the devil and he fled from you . It would be remiss of me if I didnt say to you that the man should get most of the blame as you suggested. From what you have read it seems to me that both of them was in on it. They planned that he would drop the towel in hope that the big koki will make you do what they wanted to do to you. I wouldn’t trust her again but live at peace with her. Mel the story stop at my door and don’t gossip with amyone about what happened.

  17. That’s no mind control. The friend knew exactly what she wanted just didn’t have a way of expressing it before so now she get the chance. A similar situation happen to me when i was younger with one of my friends. The day she expressed her feelings is the same damn day i told her i don’t swing that way. We are still friends till this day, but the understanding is there you follow one path and i follow another. When i do see her now she looks just like a boy. She still try throw out some sly shit, but i throw back “Yep! This Biatch is Still D!ck Only”. Shut her a@@ down one time.

    All these want to be gays, lesbo or whateva they want to call themselfs are confused as hell. My mind is not week so nobody can have me do something that i don’t want to do.

  18. For a man to bring a threesome talk to you in the first place, he already in his mind has classed you as a whore, so if it doesn’t go down today I’m sure it will go down in the future and you will blame it on alcohol or some other drug or circumstance for the occurrence.

    Let’s get this straight (No pun intended).

    You’re mesmerized by his hood, you took note that he drives a nice car, lives in a big house and that he also has multiple women, plus I’m sure that he dresses somewhat decent since he has a link abroad. All those things listed will frighten 95% of the girls in Jamaica whether they admit to it or not and the fact that you put yourself in a position where you were alone with both of them lets me know that subconsciously you were open to any type of sexual scenario that might have gone down.


    In reality the whole purpose of your post to MET is to find out if you should go through with the threesome (which by now you probably did already) and the fact that you posed the question only communicates that you’re going to go through with it and is looking for affirmation from pink wall. My advice to you is to do it if you feel to, but also consider all ramifications associated with the act. Women don’t realize that when they have sex with other women it does something to them from a psychological stand point and it’s simply not a cut and dry occurrence.

    Threesomes are sexual exploitation at its finest and just know that men seldomly marry females who they go to for these type of licentious romps. The foundation for every strong and enduring relationship is respect and threesomes are the kryptonite of the respect component in a relationship, so proceed with caution and very prep yourself for low expectations.

    1. What the phuck you typing? yu is no rass expert! The girl sent a post to share her devastation- friendship from childhood in pieces. ANd here you come wid you armchair phuckry.

      NO! it isn’t factual that a man think his woman is a whore BECAUSE he introduces the idea of a menage a trois. AND “men seldomly marry females who…” bitch stop! because it’s the UPPER-CLASS married phuckers who put that shit on the frigging map! single or married don’t have crap to do with this.

      Many freaky couples out last traditionals, and vice versa.

      Poor people and BLACK PEOPLE weren’t doing all this freaky shit 20 years ago! Jamaicans frowned up on dick sucking and eating ‘renking’ meat (suck pussy) until it start getting mentioned in dancehall lyrics! It still taboo to many. Hood in a batty still taboo regardless of culture!

      Go sit your ass down and stop trying to shame the young girl for telling her story while in distress. The girl neva a look no phuck!

      1. Throw a rock in the dark and the wounded dog, or in this case a wounded whore will holler hahaha. There is so much stupidity to address in your moronic retort. I’m not even sure if I can get to it all.

        Actually dumb azz there are numerous surveys and studies based on male and female preferences on a myriad amount of topics. Such surveys typically reveal that men look for different personailty attributes when seeking a wife, gf, fling or even female platonic relationships, so to say men arent discerning while selecting a mate and to also state that men don’t have preordained attitudes about a woman before they introduce a particular scenerio proves you either don’t know how the male mind works or you don’t read scholarly writings done on the subject.

        Women also make such distinctions as well while trying to figure out what type of relationship to pursue with certain types of men. The surveys and studies I’ve read tended to make the connection that men view women who are less sexually promiscuous as more favorable when it comes to marriage and view licentious/loose/experienced women in a more negative light with regards to matrimony. The whole concept of a woman waiting until marriage for sex was spawned from this basic information about male perspective.

        Threesomes, just like tattoos on the small of a woman’s back and belly rings are tramp stamps and most men will penalize a woman from a reputation and interaction stand point once he feels that’s the type of woman she is. So to feel that men don’t view women who partake in threesomes as less than, to women who don’t shows your ignorance towards male cognition. If men respected whores, most men would go to the strip club looking for a wife as oppose to other more respectable places.

        Threesomes are not exclusive to rich people and nor was the act started or popularized by them, so cut the stupid talk. Just because you and your hungry belly gf sell threesomes to rich uptowners doesn’t mean it’s exclusively their thing. The myth that Jamaicans don’t do or were reluctant to do oral sex in the past is straight rubbish. Perhaps it was more stigmatized in society back then in comparison to now, but it was being done under wraps since the beginning of time. Stop believing in these old dumb myths about Jamaica, in a place where a bunch of bastardized kids are produced you think oral sex would be shunned that deeply?

        Based on your retort you don’t seem too sophisticated, so I don’t expect you to understand the latency in what the senders story conveys. This isn’t a message about how to repair a friendship, it’s more about whether she should cave in to the proposal that her friend made or not. Friendships last through cohesion and if you understand why they do then you would’ve understood my initial post.

        People find sense in what reasonates with them. Your positive view on threesomes just shows your allegiance to whoredom, which I’m sure has left your dignity lower than an Antarticia winter. With regards to my qualifications, hahaha if only you knew……. Ignorance is bliss huh?

        1. Only wounded whore whey get clat a you till you have fi a write speech. You is a very wounded Duck n phuck moppet.

          If you qualifications were that great you would have expressed your views without bias and long story. Pick a view and stick wid it!

          You not rocking nothing off the hinges here 😉

  19. My girl Yuh luddy Yuh shoulda tek di likkle nyamings. Like Yuh fren hungry still…so feed har. Di man big hood amaze Yuh doe Yuh express it well…. Look at it this way right…cause u ask the question, depends on how old u are… 30 years from now would the world is gonna be so gay you gonna wish you did it with ur friend. Lol
    Run dat pussy sucking beast she is the devils to e-mail.

  20. Sender please leave that buddy alone. I understand that it big, long and look lucious, but leave it alone. I know of a similar story like this and it DIDNT end well. The two friends caught the monster from the deportee bwoy.

  21. Sender:

    1. I was wondering if this a true story. 2. Talk to ur friend, speak ur mind and then stay FAR from her. I know someone who invited her friend into her bed at her husbands request. He said she need to “spice” up their relationship (side-eye). So they went to the hotel & did the do!!! The Friend was har tenant. Wen she gone ah wuk the fren & hubby ah sex & the fren tell all the girl secrets and it cause one big dutty war. Tisk tisk…it should have never happened. Certain boundaries u don’t cross. On another note, My baby fada said if I ask him to suck me, I would get a black eye!!! No freakiness roun here!!!

  22. thanks met for entertainment, on another note, OL FIRE STICK DASH WEY DAT, WEH U A DO WID HIM, HOPE U NAW SUCK HIM BUDDY, AND HIM WI DO IT A ROAD,

  23. Uno.2 up top.wah a chat bout d gal would a dweet cause wen him drap d towel shi did a look etc etc a fool ..d gal frighten ‘ plus shi neva expect dat …uno tink a every bady stay like uno ..dats y nuff a uno mout soh stink ‘ cause uno suck all kind a hole uno mout noh have no regulation . Unoo cah even talk inna ppl face lowe d gal ‘ shi noh wah suck no puxxy

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