Do unto ….
Where do I start? This life has been a whirlwind. I have had many ups and what I thought were downs. I got married at the age of twenty seven years old gave birth to my child and got divorced shortly after. My husband became verbally abusive because I was not submissive and the first day he raised his hand to hit me I moved out 24 hours after. The reason I stayed so long was to make him feel that I had forgiven him and to be honest take two thousand dollars from the joint account and buy as much diapers I could with his credit card. I filed my divorced three weeks later. The judge gave me support for my child and I accepted that and moved on. Charles was not happy. My child and I were always together we always seemed to be rescued by God. Just before he was a year old we both spent a month in a shelter. The way I looked at those women in the shelter was helpless. They did not look like me they were all weak. I thought to myself why on earth you would go back to a man fifteen times if he had beaten you fourteen times before. Did they not see the pattern? It was too sad of a story. Thank God I was not one of them. The shelter stint ended when I gave my banking information. I have sacrificed a lot and well at that point sleeping in the shelter would put my head in the right place. This would be not in a shelter. This is not the usual – I was a teenage mother from a broken home story this is a story about a girl who made several mistakes that she managed to erase. I was born in a well to do family that I do not want to discuss. Marriage was not something that I wanted and I made up my mind that if I made it without a man I would have truly made it. The first job I got after my divorce was at Real Estate Agency I was an administrator/data entry clerk. It was a great position the pay was OK but it was not something that I wanted to do for the rest of my life. My son was in daycare and was taken care of by Great –Aunt when needed. At least twice a week I could work from home and as long as the files were updated by 2am everything was good. During the weekends twice a month I would work as a bartender at weddings to pay for any extra money problems I got myself into. I planned my life very well even my sick days I would space them out and sometimes I would call in and say my son was ill. Then we would go somewhere in another city sometimes to the park and another time to the movies. Once in a while Charles would call me yelling at me because he had to pay child support ordered by the court. He would call me everything short of a woman. My response was always the same – “Your mother told me she was an unpaid prostitute!” Then he would hang up and call me back days later apologizing for the previous rant.
It happened that I got a job at the bank and after 7 months I was not able to make the “quota” as the rest of the people did. I bravely took a sick leave and then found out I would be compensated as it was stress related. I got to stay home with my son do things that I wanted to do and we lived in this shell until I had to go back to work. When I went back to work I had a change of managers and everything was working out. I was being rewarded and given and raise my son was now in private kindergarten and I thought I was happy and everything was going good.
One evening after leaving work I got a call from Charles and on my way to pick up my son I met in an accident. Fright made me exit the car and check the backseat for my son. I forgot that he was not yet in the car. After the police took my statement I called a cab and went to get my child. For several weeks I was in pain. I got a rental car for two weeks and I was told my car was a write off and I would be given the value for the car. The value turned out to be sixteen hundred dollars less than what I thought and that put me in a rut. I found myself in so much and secretly not wanting to drive again I blamed myself and wandered why I answered the phone. How can I not drive? How will I get around? What is happening to me? My relative had borrowed seven thousand dollars from me and had called me to tell me that they were not able to make any payments to me. Then she abruptly fled the country. This made me give some choice words to her mother who was coincidentally my own mother. After this big accident and these life changing circumstances Charles pretended that he wanted to help out he ended up staying with me for a week. Men do not change. I could not add murder to this roster of shit ups so I rode it out. I could no longer work as a bartender because of the pain I was feeling. I still had to take my son to school on the bus sometimes we would be out so early that if the bus driver did not see us he would wait a little. Many times people would offer us rides and asked what happened. But I held my head high and walked right into the school and made sure my cheques were never late. I could never take that embarrassment. We took two buses to his school and he would eat his breakfast on the last bus and then I took another bus to work. After doing this for a few months I realized that this was what it was. My son and I travelled the long mornings and I got help from my Aunt in the evening.
A year after my accident I realized that Charles was missing some of his payments. I found out from him that he had been ill and was possibly not going to make it back to work. More than the money I now realized that my son could possibly be without a father. For the first time I was vulnerable. My strength had been weakened with reality. I was now alone.
I visited Charles in the hospital and I did not like what I saw. My decision was if and when he came out of the hospital I would visit him again. However, the hospital visit would be a no no. I could not bear to see him and put myself in such a state of sorrow. After three weeks Charles was released from the hospital. He had cancer.
After his operation Charles had nowhere to really go he had not been able to move around without help and he needed a caretaker. This was something I was not up for. It would make no sense for me to take in another problem. I could not manage to be a caregiver for him and my son. It was just too much for me to handle at that time. I had gotten back in to school. He was not my responsibility he was lucky I even spoke to him.
By Real
Oh my! I began to tear up on the tone of loneliness, and me remembering my before bus rides to work. Then I got to the ending…Met is this regular blogger Real that I feel a sisterly bond with on hete?
Sis if it’s you a big fat bear hug to you, for sharing. You generate your courage and strength through perseverance :kiss
A me same one big up u self mi family
Fam, all if it’s not your life story it is someone story and it has elements that we relate to some how :beer
If the author isn’t who I think…I still say much love for never giving into tribulations. Wish you all the best in life, let us know when it’s graduation day! I love cap n gowns 😀 :maafaganwati
Yes is the regular Real on here
Metti, if a lot of the meters were to relate their journey. We would be surprised. Each and everyone has a story. Real, my sistren continue to hold your head high. Trust God and continue to be the woman and mother you are. God will give you strength to carry on, open doors, bless, comfort and guide you. Keep your head up
:kiss morning ooooooooooooooo
Being a real strong woman is no easy feat….and being a mother makes it all the more challenging but all the pain, struggle, and sacrifice makes it all worth it….I know that lonliness and it’s not easy to hold and keep on….but I like you and many other real women are not easily defeated….
As I type this I’m in tears…thinking about the journey through womanhood that is now motherhood that I have just started….knowing that it’s been hard and it’s only the beginning but I have an important job to do….raising up a boy to be a man in this world we live in….thanks for sharing this Real…
Morning Met & PP
Morning to all Metters
:peluk :kiss
Feeling inspired & encouraged
good morning :peluk
I’m a single mother now myself raising 2 boys on my own ,separated from my husband (not his kids) . life is “was”rough but through it all God never leaves my side. Today March 15 is now one year since I moved into my new home. Last year u got evicted from my apartmen that I had for the last 13 years, got sick couldn’t work and up in housing court the saddest days of my life. But through it all i have to be strong for my boys i would cry at night or in the shower. Finally I couldn’t come up with all the money and they came and lock my door my kids were bawling i was numb. I didn’t kno what to do, i remember my friend is a super so I want and check him he told me there’s an empty apt that someone just moved out so we can sleep there at night and leave in the morning we did that for 2 weeks sleeping on the floor luckily the lights were still on and the heat it was February and freezing cold. But i never ever stopped working or stop my boys from going to school. Ended up in the shelter for another 2 weeks it was rough on my boys but i have to make it ok for them. Long story short I got my income tax back and found me a nice private house not too far from where i used to lived….Now it’s a year and my life is getting better because i can see it on my kids face(crying while i’m typing) we are not only women but mothers, fathers, warrior’s, leaders and with God we can move mountains.
You deserve a hug :peluk
…treat yourself to something special today- even if it’s a bouquet of flowers or a meal splurge.
PP
I’m so happy that u had d strength to weather ur storm & u didnt lose hope. Positive mindset is vital for surviving difficult times. It brings so much joy when u see happiness returning to ur children faces. Heres a sisterly hug from 1 survivor to another :peluk
Yuh determination fi succeed will take you to great heights. Blessings and prosperity to you and your sons.
Profound!!! We all have a story! I love people like you! There is a calm after all storms! :sun: :sun:
Hello Eveyone thank u so much for liking my stories … This is not my life story ….I am story teller or a writer who can relate to everyone ,..,, I thank all of you so much I will keep writing so u can understand and know we all have talents .., if u are a lady raising a child you can never be a single mother when u put God first … I hope I can inspire and educate even one …
My first encounter w/ Real on JMG was this comment she made on a groupie story about Sizzla’s inadequacies in the bedroom ” dry cry even tears” I laughed so hard tears flowed. Real I think you are very talented and you should publish your short stories. If you want a second eye/editor I will volunteer my services as I enjoy your writing.
You are most welcome :peluk
Anytime a nuh u inna di wrong nuh worry cause di said ppl dem weh hurt yuh always lucky enough live see di table turn an yuh siddung round it same way at a different angle
Moral of the story in deed.
SaranWrap, from you determine somethings must bare fruit :maafaganwati
PP
This is a great masterpiece real, I enjoyed reading it. I also have a passion for writing as well although I’m yet to publish any of my pieces, but keep up d great work & soon & very soon u’ll be having ur book launch.
Big up yu self Real, keep sending in the stories, this one is a bit touching… love it
Commendations to Real and all the Regulars in sharing these stories.The JMG fambily is probably as dysfunctional as it gets but draw solace in how inspiring and uplifting we are to each other. Thanks again Met for creating such a space of fun,genuiness an refuge. All of us are anons to each other but with each passing day,each comment,each of us sharing our own truths,it brings us closer.
I have my own image of everybody’s smile,frown,laugh of yall heart n face,i doan even need to see unno face Inna reallife dwl!!
Plz note that when someone even if it is a regular JMG fambily pass dem place by all means cuss dem yes!!However as a general plea n rule plz don’t nobody tek what ppl opening up abt and their struggles and their journey,use it cuss them!!! That’s a no no and I for one don’t rate that and won’t stand for it.
Except for PP cuz she free fi cuss any and everybody so she get a bly.She is very responsible and u can’t even malice her cuz she on point and don’t go overboard!!
Very good story!