Man creates spreadsheet of wife’s excuses for not having sex with him
A sexually-frustrated husband compiled a spreadsheet charting a whole month’s worth of his wife’s excuses for refusing to have sex with him, including “I might be getting sick” and “I still don’t feel 100%”.
For a whole month the amorous husband jotted down every response from his other half when he asked her for intimacy, which elicited replies such as “I feel gross” and “I’m watching the show”, which he claims was a re-run of a Friends episode.
The unnamed man then collated the information and put it into an excel document before emailing it to his wife as she arrived at an airport ahead of a 10-day business trip.
Excuses also include “I’m exhausted”, “I need a shower” (didn’t shower until next morning), “I’m trying to watch the movie” (fell asleep 15 min later) along with a few cases of not feeling too well and a number of ‘non-verbals’.
Shocked at the email, the anonymous lady tried to get in touch with her husband but found he had cut contact with her.
In the end, she decided to share her husband’s endeavour with users of social networking site Reddit by uploading the spreadsheet.
Spreadsheet that the sexually-frustated husband made
She then wrote: “Yesterday morning, while in a taxi on the way to the airport, husband sends a message to my work email which is connected to my phone.
“He’s never done this, we always communicate in person or by text. I open it up, and it’s a sarcastic diatribe basically saying he won’t miss me for the 10 days I’m gone.
“Attached is a spreadsheet of all the times he has tried to initiate sex since June 1st, with a column for my “excuses”, using verbatim quotes of why I didn’t feel like having sex at that very moment.”
The spreadsheet, which has since been deleted, quickly went viral with people taking both sides in the debate.
Most people criticised the husband’s “immaturity” and said he should have gone about it in a different way.
One Reddit user wrote: “There are so many ways this could have been communicated better, but instead he came up with some bizarre hit and run with a spreadsheet method which I’d say is actually going to be really hard to come back to a normal relationship from.”
Another user said: “Your husband is expressing legitimate concerns in an extremely immature and passive aggressive way. Clearly, the communication style in your relationship is shit. Fix it or don’t, it’s your marriage.”
But another user added: “Maybe her husband has got sick and tired of being totally and utterly ignored for months on end, has had enough and wants resolution to the issue. This time, after all attempts, he has got her attention.”