SHE WANTS TO KNOW WHY HER MOTHER IS DOING THIS

Gn HMID please
Mi just wah know why most mothers are the way they are if them grow a certain way make them have so much hate in them are whatever… ever since mi can remember my mother has been there financially I mean she work and mi can never take that away from her but mi Nuh sure if bcz me father hurt her to a certain extent she a take it out pan me or wah every chance she get she put me down mi can admit seh me anu the brightest thing Pan earth but trust me mi far from dunce no matter how good mi do inna school she would always seh so u culdnt do better n honestly that anu the worst thing she eva seh to me bcz it make me push harder but good god man mi never grow wid a soul fi help me wid school work so if me try n get a 80 fi hear your Mada seh shi proud a u dat a the best thing u can hear down the line she start call me johncrow and crasis n she Nuh like me from primary school days upwards till her own man get mad Pan her one night and tell her how bad she treat me

And him Nuh like it etc etc that’s primary and beginning of high school the things weh she seh to me start get worst how she start say she sorry shi have me and a me mek shi Nah live certain life and a lot more hurtful things mi try kill mi self 3 times while in grade 9 because of it mi can never do nothing fi please her n mi never really give trouble so wen mi do get in trouble the force she would beat me wid broke mi finger tump mi all inna mi breast and face eventually mi develop an anger issue each chance me get n somebody just say something mi Nuh like mi just start fight mi cut mi self and do the most swallow pills my poor grand mother affi carry mi go hospital and find excuse bcz she Nuh want them take me away and mi love me granny to death some she even treat me granny like shit she make mi granny Sidung and ball that make me even more angry fi see her a cry she can’t even cry mek shi see pretty she bully her n try justify weh shi do as if she right n she’s not…

Finally mi reach the age weh mi can’t get away from her the first chance I got I ran so far so fast but mi still have love fi har and the way how she treat me mek mi fraid fi guh round her because a she addI only person weh can seh things fi break me down mentally to the point where mi have an anxiety attack mi find a work n try help me self I wasn’t the best but It better than nothing n mi end up love the work honestly but mi get a better opportunity n guh weh guh wrk n come back mi used to send her money n how she ask fi stuff is she bully u into giving her and I did fi amount a suffer mi guh weh guh suffer n tek dis from the Jamaicans weh mi guh near she wuldnt even n ow because she only call or txt wen she want something me come back n decide fi stay over her house bcz mi miss mi granny bad and mi really come fi spend time with her n mi have some money weh mi bring down fi start a likkle bizniz n she dig up mi stuff n find it n from that everything start back she

Seh mi agu drop pan mi face n mi money agu done n she well want it done fi mi come beg her fi she run me and honestly wen me a guh weh a mi fada Len mi money fi guh weh even thou he wasn’t in the picture wen mi small mi Nuh hate him n the relationship better between us nd she nuh look like she like it.. she say how my current bf agu dis mi fi other gyal and mi big and worthless n me try Nuh touch ntg fi her Bare in mind mi a work from me a 18 1 week before me 18th bday mi strt look work and mi get through she say mi nah last 2 weeks inna the work and trust mi it did hard but mi prove her wrong n mi stay there fi almost 2yrs till the work overseas come up.. now me pregnant she worst Nuh like that but me see shi start come around n mi heart feel so mu cah better seeing that till mi wake one night n hear har outside a kill me name mi start stay far from her since night me a pass and hear her say how me never do ntg fi she proud a me yet (mi lef school wid subjects guh class n get another)

N me find everything fi me self n anything mi want mi bf give me him will give me him last n mi nah exaggerate him inna a good job but his job is kinda technical which I understand and mi did sick n mi Nuh wah stay addI house alone so mi feel better being wid mi granny… as me seh mi hear she say dat and me Sidung to mi self a cry n mi granny come check pan me and see me a cry an an tell me fi stop bcz me pregnant and stuff me couldn’t hold it anymore mi start cry and talk how I feel suh bcz me talk the truth seh she Nuh like me and she treat me like shit and me always hear her a talk pay bad about me she get mad and push down mi granny and fling mi clothes dem ofa me bed and tell mi fi come out and anu like a lie me a tell wen people come around she show the good face n not the one she show me and say she neva yet seh she Nuh like me and not even 5mins before she come in my room shi day shi Nuh like me long time cah me Nuh good 🤷🏽‍♂️ and she flip everything weh mi seh

And then start ball n seh how much me seh shi never do ntg fi me which is a lie and wen mi granny seh shi never say that shi start cus mi granny because she want somebody tell her mi right mi 4mnths pregnant and mi feel it best to run n never look back no matter how mi try forgive her for the things she do me shi always do more and more why them must do this ?? Why??