My experience with demons and living death.
by Starina Goldman
I just got done reading a few threads about demonic possession and such and am sharing my story.
I come from a Christian background and already had a strained relationship with my family and a loner kind of life which made this experience even harder. I was sexually assaulted in 2010 and my family turned their backs on me. My “Christian” family including 3 pastors, praise and worship singers/directors etc. After that something changed in me.
I was assaulted on a Sunday night, in my own home, by someone I knew who at the time was under the influence of heavy party drugs. It lasted for hours as he refused to leave and the majority of the time he spent talking switching from laid back and actually laughing to a quite, angry and disturbing demeanor. My tv was off in the room where it happened and I could see my reflection as it was happening. After a while instead of seeing myself in detail I saw a dark silhouette and went numb. He left and I sat in the same position at the edge of the bed for about 8 hours and didn’t feel any of it. Once I came to, I called my family who blamed me, asking me what did I expect hanging out with people who do drugs. I quietly got up, caught the bus and went to the hospital alone. A rape kit was done and the doctors face and words haunt me to this day. I remember he had the biggest lightest blue eyes I had ever seen. He looked serious and terrified all at the same time, grabbed my hand and said “Don’t go home, you’re not safe and I fear for you”. But I had nowhere else to go, so I went.
When I returned, I just sat. I never had bugs, it was February, cold, so no flies were around but they began to pop up in my room and I mean large flies. I watch them crawl on my body and more and more began to show up that night as I laid. I went into work the next day and barely spoke and my eyes were glued to the floor. When I was alone in the stock room the flies were with me and I noticed a dead rat I almost stepped on, but thought nothing of it. I began missing chunks of time. My bus rides, time at work and night time became a blur and everywhere I went rats were either dead or running next/crossing me and the flies would show up when I was alone. I started losing weight, my skin became gray, my eyes and mouth dark, and regardless of daylight my house was dark as night. I’d wake up sitting at the edge of my bed and everyday stare into the tv at my black silhouette. Everyday had became the same and the weekends were just me sitting at the edge of the bed. I saw more dead vermin in the streets in my paths up to my door and what seemed like hundreds if flies in my home. My co workers were terrified for me and one said I brought a darkness into the room and asked if I needed help, which I declined. No one knew what had happened.
One night I ran out of toilet paper and headed for the corner store. There and everywhere I went people stopped greeting me and looked uncomfortable. No eye contact, no nothing and I felt an indescribable loneliness. Death was on my mind after that but it wasn’t a scary thought. No tears, no real hesitation, I just accepted that I’ll be doing it soon but for some reason held off. I was at work one day and in the blink of an eye was looking at a security guard at a nearby hospital who asked what I needed and I said I’m dying. Don’t remember going at all. I told the nurse the same thing and they did tests, hooked me up to a saline drip and put me in a room to the side. I ended up in inpatient on suicide watch for a week. During that time I asked God if I was going to die and cried for the first time. It was May by then and I realized what had happened to me and wanted to live. When I got home dead flies were everywhere and I didn’t see one flying around again. I cried for weeks to the point of exhaustion but came back to and allowed people to help me. I soon moved out and haven’t experienced anything like that since. I am fully aware of the mental effects of sexual assault but that was so much more. I’m wondering how the spirits came to me. Through him or were they already there in my home waiting for my lowest point. This stuff is very real people and Thank the living God its over.


  1. This is so interesting. Might be a stupid question but were the dead animals and flies real, or a part of her imagination because she was overtaken by that spirit ?

  2. Goodnight. This could have been hallucinations ( she did a go mad from the trauma) or spritual awakening of the third eye (spiritual gift). To be sure one would continue to have future/further awakening of the gift as it goes thru stages; eg seeing things that others around u cannot see and for telling things before it happen (discerning).

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