Met,
I am beyond baffled at the legacy our Black, especially Jamaican men are leaving behind. I am a 80’s baby and I grow and see my father with over 8 baby mom and 12 plus kids. I think the lifestyle is NASTY per say, but At least he took care of All his children, he just couldn’t tame his Penis. From My Generation upward I notice Most of these Men want to plant seeds all over and forget it comes with a responsibility. For the life of me I cannot understand these men that their Dad skip town on their Moms, but yet they want to do the same thing to their Children. Did they forget how it felt wanting just to see Daddy, no matter if he had 50Cents and not even could see Daddy. I am begging for Some Male opinions as to why they do this and how do they sleep at night not knowing if their kids eat or sleep on the floor at nights. Most of these dancehall men are buying all the high price items for them and their New girlfriend that they are impressing and not even a dollar going towards their own flesh and blood. This all hit a nerve for me as my Child’s father is living this exact life. The worst part about this is these men just continuously move on to another victim and just to start the sufferization cycle again. At least the Americans do a little better in this department because Uncle SAM FORCE THEM to take care of the children until they are 18/21. Please do not suggest that I picked a better baby father, he was the “ perfect” man until I had My Child. I guess he figured I was now under his spell and at the mercy of his discretion. Everyday you see him he is clean, and if you didn’t know him you would not know he had Children because he has no time for them. My Mother told me to leave it to God as only he can show this Donor a sign.
I know I am not the only female in this situation, but I wanted to voice my opinion as it seems to now be the norm in the Jamaican Community. Why is it when break up occurs the Men forget about the Children with the EX?, Why do they feel as tho the Mother is the only person responsible for taking care of that Child? Why does it entice y’all to pour Champagne on dance floor instead of investing that $$$ into your child? It is a sad case when the poorest of people have the most Kids and then turn around cannot and will not take care of them; Then they wonder why the White folks are adamant to stay Faaaaaaaaaaar away from Us a a race/people.Funny thing is now half as these same men will remember they have Kids once Trump is ready to deport them. All of a sudden, their kids need them , they can’t go home.
nobody have to time to read all of that
you had time to type though..better yuh never badda comment kmt. Sender good points
How ride!!! I read it all. Thanks you very much!!!
sometimes a unnuh run dung hype man. when unnuh see a likkle man wha have him likkle 9-5 and have ambition n a go thru him nuh hype enough fi unnuh, when a him woulda put him all into taking care of his child. unnuh see ballers inna di party a buy top shelf liquor and unnuh poom poom jump fi dem and expect say a nigga wha a spend $2,000US a night pon liquor ago be a responsible father. when unnuh get wha di duck get now unnuh squeal n den start want paint every man with the same brush. make better choices. a nuff a we out ya responsible. right now mi have a son pon di way and mi a work extra hard cause mi nuh want him short
a ntn. bare overtime mi a clock.
I’m here for anybody who want to cuss the sender about picking a better man! Cuz it can happen to the best of them ! You could be married to a man and him pick up himself and leave you high and dry with the kids ! It doesn’t matter .. these Jamaican men need to get full force I find that too many Jamaican women let them off the hook it’s not gonna work like that dem fi get deported .. dem fi get deported dem nuh need fi deh a rd a laugh and smile a waste money and you deh a u yard wid dem piknie a suffer it doesn’t work like that these Niggas are TRASH. All if me know him a do anything illegal best believe that nigga will be going to JAIL .. dem man deh nuh fi prosper
Sorry to hear your story. Sad. Are you living in Jamaica currently ?
You did not say. It assume your child’s father is a Jamaican she joe you speak specifically about ” Jamaican men” creating a cycle of sufferiring and neglect.
Sadly, this happens all over the world, particularly in countries where men are not held accountable by law.
– Did. You try taking him to court ?
– Have you agreed to a monthly payment amount and his vistotation rights and arrangements to see the child ?
Try to be civil and level headed. Do not allow him the NOT see his child. Many women are guilty of this nonsense.
If reasoning does not work, try getting a court order for child support, a lot of countries are serious with this and even move to garnish pay checks to collect support.
– Trinidad for example, has cracked down in the last few years by arresting fathers that are in areas and not paying their
” child maintenance”
Dead beat dads and those that are behind on payments for no good reasons and have not fulfilled their responsibility, are often issued a warrant for arrest as well as have their photos air on the televisions during crime shows.
This is usually a public humiliation, because imagine you have to get a warrant and a tv profile pic, to force you to mind your child !
Pathetic.
Darling, if all else fails, mind your son without bitterness, without a evil word against his father.
Raise him well amd h shall be great and make you proud!
Well you should’ve gotten to know your mate on a deeper level before you decided to bring a child into the world. Did he have a father growing? Does he have a great relationship with the male figures in his life? Is this his first child? Because if it’s not his first then you probably could’ve seen a few signs of how he treats the other kids.
However don’t follow your mother’s advice of just leaving it to God. Take action and bring this bwoy to court and collect the money for your child.
The only answer for why some black men operate in such manner is tied to the slave system which broke the African family structure. But then again why is it that some men do step up to the plate? Sender I really don’t know but go collect them coins for your child. Take action while praying.
Are you for real with this comment?
I am in a similar situation. In my case I have taken accountability for my shortcomings in relation to making poor choices. One of which is choosing unavailable men. I believe this stems from not having my Father around myself. Therefore I can’t cuss the man without cussing myself. I prayed for any bitterness towards him to leave my heart. I am seeing changes where that is concerned. As I grow to forgive him and grow even more to forgive myself.
I love my child and if I had my life to live again I would make the same mistake just to have her in my life. I know I’ll need to put in the work so that she will not have abandonment issues like I have. Hence the poor choice men.
Statistically children who are raised in black single mother households are worse off than their counterparts, academically and behaviourally (other factors ate involved). Therefore us single mothers have to work hard to increase their chances. This is also done by us doing the work on ourselves. We can’t be bitter and blessed. Charge it to the game, move on and wish your baby daddy love and light.
Once you do well by your child, you will marvel at their successful outcome and give yourself a massive pat on the back, because you did it single handedly . That’s what I intend to do anyway.
@3:19 proud of you. You are doing well on your own and you have acknowledged your past mistakes in choosing a mate.
I love how you are trying to erase all the bitterness from your life as it is not worth it. So many Black women are angry. It sucks out all other positive emotions.
I am blessed that I am not faced with a painful situation like these women, but it still HURTS me, because every every child deserved to be acknowledged, loved and have a father in their lives and hearts.
Whether he can provide financially or emotionally, women allow the man to still see the child if he is not aggressive or abusive
All y’all bitches talking bout sender run down man and making bad choices shut the fck up .. I bet y’all in worst position GWEH yow stop judging people ..
No need to judge the sender. I am in a similar situation. This man pursued me for months. I have some of the screenshots to show. The baby was his idea, everything. His true colours started to show when I was 3 months pregnant. He was emotionally abusive and disrespectful throughout my pregnancy. I used to say to myself that if I make it though the pregnancy, then there’s nothing in life that I couldn’t do. I found out the hard way that he was truly a manipulative and disgusting person. He even talked about not having his parents in his life so he would definitely care for his child…LIE! Well, he gives if and when he feels like. I realized he’s the type of person that wants people to bow down to him, so I just leave him alone. I don’t ask him for a damn thing. Sometimes I want to put his picture and name out there just to warn other females, but something telling me to leave him to time. So for those who want to judge, feel free. Just make sure you don’t find yourself in a similar situation. One thing is for sure though, this will never reach me again. If I put him on blast alot of people would actually think that i’m lying because of the ‘kind’ person that he pretends to be.
Her story is to send a message to other folkes and not for us to rip her down. Sender thank you for sharing, reality is this can happen to the best of us, dont feel bad. I had a guy and he was in good job, he is very ambitious, he had 4 outside sons that he took very well of, he got his first son when he was deployed in bush war time in middle east. Would you beleive it, the man realise i was no walk over, came to my place one day and open the fridge, the man say why my place always full a food and took out a beer and shut back the fridge, he was staying 4 days with me, i made him cut it to 2 as i told him i had an important meeting with top management and he left the 2nd day. Some men are evil and as a successful woman they will hate us and badmind us for our success. From that day i avoid him, hardly call him and the man just stop calling me and i block his number and have not called him for 14 months now. The hearts of men can be evil n u and a man can be married for 10 years or more and him walk out on u and u will never know why. But more a more i am seeing more men now a days being envious of their female partners, some even set up their female partners to get rob too.